It's amazing to me how many people in a UU church say they "hate to bother" their minister. Folks can go through car wrecks, relationship break-ups, job lay-offs, death of a loved one, and even major depression and never call (or ask someone else to call) their minister. Ministers who don't know what you're going through cannot help you go through it. Ministers who are not informed that you are in trouble with the law, have money worries, are anxious over health issues, are grieving a loss, or whatever, cannot give you aid and comfort, or see that you are connected to the appropriate local resources.
Each and every one of us ministers went into this line of work, not for the fabulous pay and incredible perks (although those are great!), but in order to be of help, to be of service. It is what we want and need to do. And at the very least, it is part of what you pay us for. So here's a handy list of when a First Churcher should contact the minister in the new year:
When you have a concern, complaint, or issue with something going on in the church or with something the minister has done or not done.
When you have a compliment or a suggestion for the church or for the minister.
When you are sad, mourning a loss, grieving a death, or missing someone you care about.
When you have achieved something, received an award, or been given recognition for an accomplishment.
When you are struggling with fear or despair or depression or post-traumatic stress.
When you find you have anger issues, or when a loved one asks you to get help for your anger.
When you are coping with substance abuse issues, such as alcohol or illegal drugs or prescribed medications. Or when you are coping with the substance abuse of a partner or family member.
When you've had a car accident or have scheduled surgery.
When you or a family member has been arrested or been sued.
When you've gotten notice that you're getting, or not getting, your Road Home money, your insurance check, and/or your SBA loan.
When you've FINALLY finished the work on your house, or when you need help in getting it finished.
When you want a religious ritual to mark an important life transition, such as birth or adoption, miscarriage, coming of age, union ceremony, anniversary ritual, new home (or rebuilt home) blessing, dissolution of a relationship, passage into chronic illness and/or wise elderhood, or a memorial service.
When you need discernment in an important life decision.
When you have questions about Unitarian Universalism.
When you just want someone to have coffee and conversation with.
I'm looking forward to your calls and emails -- and all that coffee.
In faith and hope and love,
MELANIE
